The Significance of the Insignificance of “How Are You?”

Today I was in a store and I heard a person working there greet people with the question, “How are you?” Coincidentally, all of them were “fine.”

I was surprised that all these people -- tall, short, fat, thin, crippled -- described their well-being in the same manner. Is it just a necessary formality? I suspect she didn’t really care how the person was doing, but is required by law to ask in order to appear polite. Yet, I also suspect that the people being asked don’t care to share their feelings and emotions with the asker, but would feel offended if they weren’t given the opportunity. It seems to be a silly societal game played to keep civilization happy. I prefer checkers.

The work person soon spotted me as I was trying on a shirt and got it stuck over my antlers. “How are you?” she asked me. I answered more in-depth.

I explained to her that despite the tangling of the shirt with my antlers, things were going relatively well since leaving the woods. I told her how much better I’ve been eating and how great the climate control of heat indoors is, as opposed to the night cold outside. I also told her that I would soon need to locate a bathroom, and would be feeling even better afterward.

She smiled and walked away.